Showing posts with label menyek-menyek. Show all posts
Showing posts with label menyek-menyek. Show all posts

Starting over

Has it been four years? Nearly five years maybe. Quite a stretch of time since I committed not to have direct communication with him. Well I slipped two times, dialed a number just to hear his voice. I regretted that because the conversation was stiffed, but ever since I’ve been very clean. Living continents apart set a solid distance and I must say that I had my heart healed.


But suddenly the opportunity arrived and I’d be in his town. It makes some sense to pay a visit. Say a hello, maybe. A coffee or two. I braced my self to confront my own shadow and the ghost of him. The soft dark tone that wasn’t haunting anymore but softly lingering.
And it turned out to be a burst of fun. We started with a meet-up in a bar, our bound with beers have always been there. His broken English were still apparent, but I got it. I always got him. His brutal honest sense of humor has always made me like him a little bit more. And after few pints, we quickly tightened the bound between us. It was as perfect as we began our first relationship, as best friends.
So many laughs, as this country was the country we lived in. He seems distanced, but I was very open. I ordered another round, and nudged him to confess. And by then he realized that I didn’t do any harm, the air was filled with a good intention. It was raining gently outside, but inside I felt nothing but warm. We had a good time, but I signaled him that I have to end the night. He dropped me off in front of my hotel gate, and when I took a look out of the window, I could see him walking slowly on a wet pathway with a sheepish smile.
The next morning my landline phone in the hotel room rang. It was him telling me that he managed to rent a bike for me and would like to take me for a daytrip in a country side. We pedalled our bike on the road to Amerongen, he went ahead I followed suit. Such a fine late summer morning until we hit the muddy road. We had too much fun that we forgot yesterday’s rain. His sports bike strolled easily while mine was dragging along with a lot of mud burst everywhere. Oh, we let a lot of laugh.
I had a another day trip without him to meet the guy that I used to have a huge crush on. Two hours went by in a flash, my dreams were fulfilled. During some alone time waiting for the train, I jotted down that I was very happy. Also, I can’t wait to meet him to tell him how happy I was. The urge to share was unbearable.

On my last night in town, we decided to meet up in a student pub. Oh, well. This could have been difficult and awkward. He was usually quiet as I fished out some talks. But I was glowing, and couldn’t stop smiling. I was glad that I spent time in his town and rekindled our connection. After all, he deserves to be loved in a sincere way and sparked with good will.
And when the night finally gave up, we hug. Such a deep and warm hug with all our might. It was as perfect as we hug four years ago, before I departed with my flight.

Only this time we start it all over again as best friends.

I guess I have done my part of forgiveness very well.

Symmetry Mood


I know I must write a lot since I was in a very intense traveling in the past two weeks. I wrote some in my lovely red moleskin journal, but I could not transfer it into digital file. I don’t know why, my self just doesn’t want to do it.

Instead, today I’ve been in a very mellow mood. I am suspicious, well rather convinced then, that it is something to do with my hormonal cycle. It is about time.

And I could not listen to any other song than this.

How I’m loving the opening: I caught in a symmetry of your mind…


I'm caught in the symmetry of your mind

But I'm not happier than you

Did I really see you or was it just a dream

Dreaming that it was seamless

Not a trace of wrong words

That we have spoken

Little did we know

No bigotry no tears shed

Ohh if only

You'd try to be polite

Thinking you were right

Only to find that you're unkind

But ironically you will always be

Belle of The Ball ...at least to me


Symmetry – Mew


Yeah, I am convinced that I miss you. But I am protecting my heart so tight, not to have it wounded. Not even bruished. This long distance relationship has never been kind for me. In anyway.

Miles


Can I say, I miss you?
Is the phrase outplaced or should be edited?
And, if I say this mouth of glass tasted similar with your mouth, will you think I’m insane?

And It’s always times like this I think of you and wonder if you ever think of me.
Do you remember the lines? Aha, we once sang the melody together, didn’t we?
I bet you know the lyrics that followed.
‘Cause everything’s so wrong, and I don’t belong living in your precious memories.

Ouch, this thousand miles is killing me. Although after thousand miles you’ll be home.
And I wish silently in my heart, that I would be a part of it.

Or, maybe a port would do.

Anyone Else But You

You're a part time lover and a full time friend
The monkey on you're back is the latest trend
I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone else
But you

I kiss you on the brain in the shadow of a train
I kiss you all starry eyed, my body's swinging from side to side
I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone else
But you

You know I amazed by the scene when the girl grabbed her guitar and rode her bicycle along the road. The boy is ready with his guitar on his lap then they were playing the guitar while singing the song. Not perfectly, but beautifully still. You know I like the way they met at the porch and the sun is shining on the girl’s face. And you know I instantly smitten by the song. I know by the way you smiled, that you know her bicycle is the next thing on my wish list.

What you don’t know is, having my belly bloated up like the girl, is also in my wish list.
And another thing, there was another scene that amazed me.

The girl: “I think I’m in love with you. You're like... the coolest person I've ever met and you don't even have to try.
The boy: “I try really hard actually.”

Yup, I wish I had this kind of courage to come up to you and said it aimlessly like the girl did.
Instead of writing the words down on blog like this.

You are always trying to keep it real
I'm in love with how you feel
I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone else
But you

Anyone Else But You – Moldy Peaches
OST Juno

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